so, master was online! but do you think he'd hit me back? no! hell, i hate him for doing all this to me!
i really try to forget him, and try to ignore all the dreams of him, try to forget it and yeah.. it may work, don't think too much bout him but i always have a sick feeling when i listen to sad music..
but i try, try and try! well in such situations i always try to be strong, and i think i am as long as i have my friends. but what shall i do, when he responses in a week or something?
but i'll make it. i know it, and all my friends know, if someone hurt me bad, i hate him for the rest of my life until he apologized.. even all of this: still hope that we could be friends, cause i planned a trip to england and he's real cute and.. yeah.. HARR, haha! wanna visit blackpool, manchester, liverpool, london and oxford and he told me that he moves to oxford and i really hope to see him..

you may realized: got random feelings.. maybe i really love him? or it turned to hate? or maybe i just need a man?

another thing: i don't know what i should think about my real best friends, i have 6 years or something ago. there are three: deniz, tobi and marcus and deniz is the only one who would get in touch with me by herself. but to talk to marcus or tobi i ALWAYS, really ALWAYS have to phone to them to talk to them.. I have to get in touch with THEM, they even don't think about phoning ME or just write a message somewhere. there are so many alternatives: msn, sms, e-mail, phone.. especially tobi.. tobi is one of the biggest disappointment this year. he has a second chance, but i think he doesn't know and if something like this happens again, i'll never call him a friend. it just would mean that i'm unimportant.

so, now i have this week of and next week i've to work every day and keep your fingers crossed for me that i'll make it.. work in a callcenter and have to phone 5 hours to people i don't know. but the main thing is that i get my money! shopping, shopping shopping and PARRRRTY!! yeah.. i think in the first month i'd throw my money away in every shop and café.
and another thing you don't know: i'll move out in summer, hope to charlottenburg but everyone knos: it's EXPENSIVE ther so i hope to have a flat share with janine and jess. it HAVE TO work..

so, after all i feel good now.. can't sleep but have to passe the pc to my bro cause he has got some homework to do.

see you and take care! keep your noodles hanged and stay dry!